The Lost Boys: How do you help fatherless teens who ask: ‘Am I the problem?’

Teenage Boys “Feel Abandoned” as Schools Launch Mentoring Drive

Tuesday 17 February 2026 | 08:07 | UK

A new report by the Centre for Social Justice has warned that 2.5 million children across the UK are growing up without a father figure, raising concerns about the impact on boys’ education, employment prospects and mental health.

The report, titled Lost Boys, suggests teenage boys are lagging behind girls at every stage of education — from primary school through to GCSEs — while the number of young men not in education, employment or training has risen sharply since the pandemic. Boys also make up 98% of the youth prison population.

“You question yourself”

Raphael, 15, says his father left when he was two and has since started a new family abroad.

“You feel abandoned almost,” he says. “You start to question yourself. Am I enough? Am I the problem?”

He describes turning to YouTube to learn everyday skills such as tying a tie — moments he says he wished he could share with a father.

“You devalue yourself for something that isn’t in or was never in your control,” he adds.

Raphael has received counselling support at school and says it has helped him regain focus.

Mentoring movement inspired by Southgate

At Brighton Hill Community School, headteacher Chris Edwards has launched a mentoring initiative called The GOAT (Greatest Of All The) Boys — a community network of male role models aimed at supporting teenage boys.

The idea was partly inspired by a speech from former England manager Gareth Southgate, who said young men are “grappling with their masculinity and their broader place in society” and called for more mentors for boys.

The school has brought together teachers, youth workers and police to address the challenges facing teenage boys, from disengagement in school to vulnerability to criminal exploitation.

Mr Edwards admits the outcomes are not always positive.

“We have seen things go wrong,” he says. “We haven’t been able to save them all.”

He notes that persuading boys to prioritise GCSEs can be difficult when they are offered quick money for illegal work outside school.

“Boys are expected not to show emotion”

Jacob, 16, struggled after his father suffered a stroke and began skipping school.

“I don’t think I’d know what to do without my dad,” he says. “Him being unwell was hard for me.”

He believes social expectations play a role in boys’ emotional struggles.

“Boys are expected to not really show emotion — and that’s something that needs to be changed.”

Both Jacob and Raphael found support through time with mentors and gym sessions designed to help them channel frustration constructively. They are now back on track academically.

Community response

After advertising locally for volunteers, the school launched the GOAT Boys project with some uncertainty about turnout.

More than 50 men — including business leaders, sports coaches and the local MP — attended the launch, providing enough mentors for each boy selected for the programme.

Neal Brand, one of the mentors, said: “Every man should get involved. They have nowhere to go, no social clubs, nothing to do. We’ve got so much to give back.”

More than 50 schools have since expressed interest in launching similar programmes.

For Raphael, the message to other boys without a father figure is clear:

“Use it as your why. Don’t use it as an excuse not to do things — use it as a reason why you did things.”